Let's Dance.

Let's Dance.

I’ve always been a music lover. 

Since I was a teen, and listened to Duran Duran and Wham! on repeat.

I’ve always had a soundtrack running in the background of my life - and often in the foreground as well. So much of my life experience can be connected to what album I was listening to at the time.

Music has this ability to call up emotions,  both in the moment emotions and those that are nostalgic. It can take you back, it can bring you into the now. It’s a way to relate your embodied experience to the situations and circumstances in your life. Music lovers don’t just listen to music, we FEEL the world through it.

I remember the evening I learned that George Michael had passed, I sat alone in my studio listening to Wham! and crying.   It wasn’t so much that I felt sad about George dying, I didn’t even really know him.   (like really didn’t, in 1986 I was going to marry this man - I had no inkling that that could NEVER have been a possibility for me).  Of course, I felt compassion for George’s loved ones, but my grief was deeper than that.

It was the grief of time passing.  Of things ending.   Of an iconic part of my youth dying.

Ive had this feeling of nostalgia a lot this past week.  Every time I checked in on social media, I saw photographs of children who I’ve known for a good portion of their lives heading back to school and they all looked so OLD this year.   Like, how on earth is little Sammy already a teenager?  She should still be in grade 2.

I don’t know why I didn’t notice this before this year. But, perhaps these teachings come as we need them.

I expect my Tantric practice has also been offering me a deeper and more acute awareness of my body, of time passing, of the seasons changing.  Maybe this deepening connection to my humanity brought me into closer relationship with the changing world around me.

Nothing stays the same.

This week, a band that I’ve been listening to for over 20 years released what will be their last album.

With lyrics like, “if youth is wasted on the young, then waste it on the old”, it feels like an ode to time passing. Again, reminding me of the lesson I’m meant to be learning right now.

Favourite bands do make last albums.

Kids grow up. 

Your childhood crush dies.

One could really dive into this and get very depressed.   Or, it could be a deeper exploration around what it means to be present.

Many spiritual practices ask that we practice “non attachment”, claiming that the root of all suffering is our attachment to ideas, things, people, beliefs, objects, and thoughts.

Yet, as human beings who bond deeply - we can’t help but become attached.  And, maybe we need to consider that avoiding suffering isn’t the practice.   Perhaps the practice is in how we move through the suffering that is inevitable with our finite bodies. 

And all around me, I keep seeing messages of how my attachment to ideas or ways of being is creating suffering in my life. Like some sort of cosmic joke.

So, when things went off kilter in a business partnership.  I felt sad.

When a favourite student cancelled their class with me.  I felt sad.

When I was arguing with my husband.  I felt sad.

When I sat with my mom to feed her dinner at the nursing home. I felt sad.

When the bright sunny mornings turned dark again.   I felt sad. 

When my favourite band released their last album.  I felt sad. 

And, this morning I heard a quote in a podcast, “our purpose as Luminous Beings having a human experience is to evolve”

And, while it’s tempting to curl up in a little ball and grieve, shut down, resist and fear the passing of time,

fear that my kids are not little any more.  

fear that I’m running out of time being human and that one day I’ll die,

I’m going to make a different choice. YES, I totally laid on my studio floor curled up in a ball feeling sorry for myself for a while. But, the ache of humanity is HOLY. This is a growth space for my Luminosity. I can evolve through this.

And so, I’m going to dance.   I’m going to embrace this life.  This passing, beautiful, experience of humanity. 

I’m going to embrace my human body.  Love her.   Show her pleasure.   And I’m going to LOVE everyone around me even more than I do right now.  Love them for their humanity, their pain, and their beauty.

Impermanence is a head fuck.  There is no doubt, and attachment is going to happen.  To be honest, I’m not interested in avoiding it.

So, why not dance with it my friends?

From, “And Nothing Hurt” by Spiritualized 

“Let’s Dance”

Though I'm tired just sitting here talking with you

There's better things y'know a lonely rock 'n' roller can do

The hour is getting late

They're putting all our dreams away

And lord have mercy on all of our thoughts today

I should get away

But I would rather stay and dance

C'mon darling let's dance

Although I'm tired just sitting here falling for you

There's better things y'know a lonely boy and girl can do

The hour is getting late

They're pulling all the curtains drawn and

We got the rest of our lives 'til the coming dawn

Hold my hand awhile

We'll go out in style and dance

C'mon darling let's dance

I'll say a little prayer for us girl

I'll say a little prayer for us girl

I'll say a little prayer for us girl

I'll say a little prayer for us girl

Though I'm tired just sitting here singing for you

There's better things y'know a lonely rock 'n' roller can do

The hour is getting late

They're putting all the chairs away

If they've got Big Star on the radio they'll let us stay

Oh, September girl

Come and rule my world and dance

C'mon darling let's dance

C'mon baby let's dance

C'mon darling let's dance (I'll say a little prayer for us girl)

C'mon baby let's dance (I'll say a little prayer for us girl)

C'mon darling let's dance (I'll say a little prayer for us girl)

C'mon baby let's dance (I'll say a little prayer for us girl)

Show a little love

I wanna be close to mine and

Have a little heart

I'll keep my own in time and

Show a little love

I wanna be close to mine

And dance

Back in the studio again.

Back in the studio again.

Taking the easy road to manifesting my desires...

Taking the easy road to manifesting my desires...